Maria Sanchez, born in San Diego, spent her student life through eighth grade
in a local Catholic parochial school. Like the other students she wore a
uniform and participated in the activities. She also enjoyed the tasty and
generally high calorie meals of the multi-lingual section of San Diego where
she had been born. Weight issues were not a concern in her world, for she was
but one of many heavier students and adults in that community. Carrying
perhaps 140 lbs (maybe it was 160, no one was counting then) on a five foot
frame was not all that unusual for a blossoming teenager.
What was remarkable about her was the family of which she was a part. Her
parents were remarkably ambitious, both for themselves and their three
children. Books in both English and Spanish were part of their heritage from
infancy, and joint study was a part of life. In this manner Maria grew up as
a good student, enjoyed swimming and reading, content with her lot.
The family made a point both of maintaining their culture but also looking
beyond the barrio. On vacations they traveled not only to Mexico, but to
points around the United States, deep into Latin America, and once even to
Europe. They had an international short wave radio and discussed national
events and world affairs at the table in the pattern of the Kennedys. The
Sanchez family was, as a result, remarkably well rounded in more ways than
one.
Maria enjoyed cycling. When wearing her white biking shorts her developing
belly roll protruded noticeably beneath her favorite blue blouse, just as her
full hips pushed at the seams to the rear. She was a plumpening beauty, but
one with ample muscles and energy to accompany her bulk. In all of this, as
we have said, she was not any more noticeable than a score of others in the
Hispanic community. Had not her Father's company transferred him to Spokane,
Washington just after graduation from middle school the story events recounted
below might never have happened.
This, you see, is not a tale primarily about gaining weight. Rather it is
about how a young lady already of some size adapted to a totally new
environment --- as told to me by one who was not only heavier than the
average, but also of another racial and linguistic background.
Maria today recalls that she never thought of herself or her weight in a
negative manner. It was simply accepted among her peers in San Diego that a
certain percentage were heavier than the average. Her mother was a heavier
person, yet loved adoringly by her father. Most of her aunts were stout,
jolly, and happily married as well. The concern of her parents for all of
their children was that they should be industrious and develop their minds as
they had --- thus being able to escape from the economic poverty of their
parents before them.
But then came the move to Spokane. Maria entered high school knowing no one.
In that environment she was definitely one of the heavier freshmen. Pictures
taken at the time show two developing belly rolls evident beneath her
developing chest, as were a matching set of love handles on either side. Her
thighs were strong from many hours biking, as well as in the swimming pool,
easily supporting her ample hips. Her arms and calves were quite plump, and
her very round face was accented by her cascading black hair. To say that she
carried her weight with an elegant, almost authoritative, confidence would be
perhaps the fairest and most accurate description.
This type of persona is also not the norm of the predominantly anglo culture
of suburban Spokane. No one was so ungracious however, as to openly tease
Maria, and she settled into her studies quite easily, but neither did she gain
instant acceptance. In fact, she was bored with the ease with which she was
able to get A's in the public school system --- and bugged at the noise and
disruptiveness of the students. Their nonsense, harmless enough she supposed,
would never have been tolerated by the sisters at St. Angelicas!
The disciplined study habits and intensity of her parochial school background
were, of course, giving her an edge in reading and math skills, and she spent
the first few months just enjoying a new community and climate. She also
became acquainted with the pizzas, burgers, and other cuisine of the
cafeteria. Their Mexican food, she sighed, was a joke compared to what she
know how to make! The weather was also a lot colder than what she had been
used to. But to all of this she gradually adapted.
The most difficult part, she recalls, was making friends as a high school
freshman with brown skin in a new town. By the winter break she was climbing
the walls for lack of activity and conversation with people her own age. And
she knew that all the snacking in world was not going to fill the craving for
acceptance. But the problem, she saw, was not just that she was an outsider
--- the fact was that she didn't really want to be inside of what she saw
going on. The conversations all seemed so shallow and meaningless.
For some thirteen year olds this would have been a time to either sink into
depression or get into mischief. Maria, however, was not your ordinary teen.
Her parents had been taught that you could take charge of circumstances, and
this lesson had been passed along to their children. She now decided to do so.
It began by talking with three adults --- her own Father, a priest at their
new Church, and one of the counselors at her school. Each tried to help her,
and fortunately none of them made an issue of her weight.
Her Father reminded her of his own experience. He explained that their entire
family was different, not just in skin but in training and values. She was
fluent in two languages, traveled and acquainted with places others had never
been, and therefore should not expect to find others to be just like her. He
shared with her some of the accommodations he had had to make in life to get
along with those of more limited perspective --- they were not, he reminded
her, bad people, just limited. You will need, he said, to find ways to share
parts of yourself with them, but don't expect to be able to share everything
with everyone.
The priest suggested developing a relationship with the church youth group,
which had a few Hispanics and a value structure more like what she was used
to. Unknowingly echoing her father, he pointed out that her mental age may
have surpassed her chronological age. Thus persons in her grade level might
not want or be able to open up as someone five years older might. He
suggested trying a different peer group --- even thinking about getting a
challenging job. He even that, when the time came, he knew where someone as
smart as she might needed.
The school counselor suggested involvement as well, possibly with one or two
school clubs, but also had another idea. The high school had a mentoring
program for slower learners; most of those serving as mentors were juniors and
seniors, but there were no Spanish language mentors. If Maria was interested,
perhaps arrangements could be made. And of course she should think about the
swimming team.
These were the options and suggestions which Maria mulled over during the
winter break. Her studies were taking very little time, so she decided to try
a little of both the church and the high school. She began attending meetings
of the former and became both a mentor and a member of the home economics and
chess clubs at the latter. She also began swimming more, thinking possibly of
becoming part of the long distance swim team where endurance rather than
litheness and speed were critical. In all four areas she made a point, as her
father always did, of learning people's names and using them to give them
recognition. She also proved herself to be a willing and hard worker.
She had two students to mentor that first semester --- both came to her house,
where she shared Mexican as well as American snacks. She taught them culture
as well as vocabulary and grammar, and their grades improved. She also proved
adept in the chess club, even taking on Senior men and occasionally beating
them. In home economics she showed others how to make the garments of Mexico
even as she learned the skills of her new home town. And by sharing herself
in each of these areas she managed to make a few friends in each one.
Did she also attract on a few more pounds? Most assuredly so, for by that
summer all of her clothes from San Diego were too tight and had to be given
away. By the summer before her sophomore year she was around 5'5" and nearly
180 pounds. It was, as she says, either in her genes or her mother's cooking,
for she doesn't recall eating all that much. It certainly wasn't the tacos and
enchiladas at the high school! They were so lacking in quality she refused to
touch them. But at the time her caloric intake was not something to which she
paying any concern, for by now she was far too busy.
The mentoring efforts succeeded --- and based on her student's success Maria
successfully lobbied the counselors to include more non-seniors in the
program. In her mind there was no reason why any student needing help with
homework shouldn't have it --- especially since every student was required to
have community service hours anyway. She was more than willing to share with
newer mentors the experience she had gleaned. No one really cared about her
food consumption, for she was already beginning to forge a unique image of her
own.
That fall she became an officer in both the Church youth group and the Home
Economics Club. She also made the swim team, where her sturdy legs and strong
arms proved assets in the long distance relays. Beneath the deceptive outward
rolls was a very strong muscular system which she thoroughly enjoyed using.
Her participation in activities gave her increasing acceptance among the
students. When the Sophomore class secretary/treasurer had to move she was
asked to take her place and accepted.
The class treasury was in definite trouble as she took over. Two pancake
breakfasts had produced only a fraction of the needed funds. Talking with
friends in Home Economics and at Church she came up with an idea --- a Mexican
American fiesta, complete with a variety of genuine Hispanic dishes, a piata,
and games for the kids. Most of the winter break was devoted nonstop to the
details and, when held in mid-January, it was a success.
It also brought Maria the first uncomfortable taste of prejudice. In putting
together the fiesta Maria had built a cadre of helpers, made up in large part
of friends from church and the home EC club, but also including a number of
other larger girls who had been outcasts. She had seen them simply as people
who obviously liked food and could therefore, probably be trained to do it
right.
In this perception she had been correct. What she did not fully anticipate is
that it would also give them some of the same self confidence and assurance
she possessed. They were coming out of their shells, being friendlier, and in
the process attracting the attention of their white skinned male counterparts.
This posed a threat to some of the more insecure coeds, who retaliated by
making remarks about those who "pattern their life after fat Mexicans."
The taunts got back first to one of Maria's younger sisters, then to Maria.
She was at first hurt, then angry. All that she had done was solve some
problems --- why should others be so jealous? And what could she do to strike
back?
For really the first time she looked at herself in a mirror. Now approaching
200 pounds she was, she had to admit, indeed perhaps a "fat Mexican." But she
did not find herself bad looking --- only different. She was no fatter than
her mother or aunts, in fact a good deal less. And her weight was solidly
placed, not at all flabby. "What is wrong with being who I am," she fumed.
"And why should I let these people get to me?"
Then it came to her. The critics were jealous of her because they were afraid
--- they had no depth, no cooking ability, no linguistic ability, no ability
to hold a serious conversation. All they had was their primping and cooing.
Maybe the answer was to give them something to really be frightened of ---
what would happen if girls of size were to really start competing with them.
Four of the plumpers she had used for the Fiesta she knew also had grades like
hers. She invited them all to her house for a venting session.
"I need your help," she said. "My sister is having to put up with hearing
insults about my race and size --- and I think the real issue is that some of
the prima donnas at school feel threatened not by just me, but you. I propose
to prove that they have good reason for the fears --- and that the only real
answer is for them to stop criticizing us and start competing with their
brains as well as their bodies."
"If you could raise the competition to that level they would probably lose!"
exclaimed Phyllis Raymond, a 200+ lb. blond."
"We can," Maria said. "Why not have the Home Ec Club sponsor a series of
ethnic food days --- and ask some of the guys to help in exchange for free
food?"
"You mean like ask them to get recipes for us and help in the cooking?"
remarked Alice Morris, a 180#+ brunette.
"Exactly. We have at least 4-5 groups of guys on campus who come from various
heritages --- we ask for their help while we run the show. Of course help
includes their pretesting the menu before we offer it to everyone. I think
they would enjoy it."
"And how do we finance all this?" queried Gwen Adams, a short 5'2" plumper.
"We finance some by working, for which we will get paid. Father Griswold has
put me in touch with a catering service that can give us part time jobs. We
will also use donations from ethnic restaurants who will be credited for the
publicity value. I have already lined up three that are willing to try an
experiment. To get greater participation we donate all profits to various
charities. Now, each of us will need to recruit at least 3 more people and we
should be able to get started."
The next meeting of the Home Ec Club saw several new members join - and the
project was underway. The first food day was an Italian theme, held in March.
Word of the excellence of the pretesting sessions got around and it was a
smashing success. By the next month various of the other men on campus were
asking if they could be testers for the Chinese meal April and the
Mediterranean day in May.
Maria made sure the local media were kept fully abreast of what was happening,
but never mentioned that it was a "fat person's revenge." Rather she let the
Home Economics Club and her co-workers be credited for what they had done ---
their size was obvious enough without being trumpeted.
The improved self esteem among her co-laborers also achieved its effect. They
were dressing more sharply and their carriage reflected greater confidence.
They even began initiating conversations with the guys on campus and showing
themselves to be friendly and kind, not obsessed with themselves. As a result
all began to be asked for more dates and be treated more respectfully than
before. At first there were occasional gibes at their size by the elitists,
but now even the men saw such remarks as "sour grapes" by persons of lesser
accomplishment. After all, how many press clipping and news vans did the
critics have?
Maria was a shoo-in for Treasurer of the student body her Junior year, the
same one in which the swimming team made it to the State Championships.
Although losing to a team from a much larger school in Seattle, their second
place finish was higher than any local school team had ever made it before.
Some students began to tout her for student body president her Senior year,
even though she would be the first woman president the school had had. Her
opponent would likely be Irwin Jenkins, a nice enough scion of a local wealthy
family who she did not dislike but wasn't that well regarded by some of the
other students because of his perceived aloofness.
By now she was 5'6" and well over 200 lbs. She wrestled with the idea ---
realizing how unique it would be for a stout, brownskinned non-anglo to be
president of a predominately white student body in a Spokane suburb. It
wasn't that she was afraid of the job; she wondered if she could really win
such an election. She was used to winning, the vice-presidency was probably
hers for the asking, could she stand it if she lost?
She went and talked with Father Griswold. "I am a person who tries to have
faith," she said, "and God has blessed me in many ways. But this may be out of
my league."
"Maria," said Father Griswold, "you have been redefining the league for three
years -- ever since you got here. You started out teaching the ones the
teachers were giving up on, then you solved a problem created on the watch of
another, then you broke a number of stereotypes and helped do something that
hadn't been done in 110 years. If you were to lose, there is a time to learn
humility. But if you were to win you could do even more. Not to have at least
tried is something I do not think you could ever be happy living with."
"I think I see what you mean --- I will run as a candidate being for something
rather than just trying to upset tradition."
That night she wrote an essay --- WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?
"I am running for President of the student body --- not from personal
ambition,. but at the request of those who have already come further than they
ever expected, and who now feel there is further to go.
"We have all enjoyed the glory of going to a state championship, of basking in
favorable publicity from a media which too often portrays teens as trouble
making delinquents, and have shared in an improvement of our academic image as
well.
"It has been my privilege to work closely with all of the groups that have
brought these things to pass --- and now they have urged me to help them
finish the job.
"It is not enough to have had a few small groups be empowered to the point
that they have done exceptional things. The doors which have been opened for
us must be opened for all, permanently. Only in this way can those in future
classes, perhaps our own children, follow in the trails that have been blazed.
"I am not opposed to the traditions of our school, but rather favor building
upon the best in those traditions to meet the new needs of the future. In
running for office I offer nothing dramatically different from what I have
already bee doing, but merely an extension of what it has been my privilege to
be a part of thus far. If there are enough other students who share my view
of the need for this opening of doors I feel we can do it --- and by electing
me, and those running with me, you will have given your answer.
"I have, therefore, declared my candidacy and now humbly ask for your
support."
She and Irwin Jenkins both posted the usual materials and circulated the usual
flyers. It was a clean campaign, with neither protagonist attacking the other
at a personal level. But Maria had an agenda which became increasingly clear;
Irwin neither opposed it nor presented one of his own. Some privately felt
that he was running more to please his family than anything else --- that
actually he felt Maria really wanted the job more than he did and was glad to
let her have it.
Whatever the reason, Maria and her companions pulled 60% of the vote. When
the election was over she offered her defeated opponents jobs on the
committees which were established and many, including Irwin, accepted. The
time had now come to deliver on her vision.
One of her first steps surprised everyone. Using a team of volunteers, she
had placed into a database by the end of June the name of every student and
school group, making a match of who was participating in what. The purpose:
to find out who was NOT participating in some way. 280 students out of an
1100 person student body were found to be in this category, 400 more to be
only nominally involved. A few of these names were culled out as known
troublemakers, The balance were given to seven teams for contact by Mid-
August, the objective: to find out why the people were not involved and assess
how they could be drawn in.
While the students were contacting other students Maria and the newly elected
officers went to work on the PTA --- "we will try to do this on our own if we
have to, but we could do better with your help" was the theme. "Why just
Parent-Teachers? Why not make it a Parent-Teacher-Student dialogue?"
Contacts were also made with local social and service clubs, looking for ways
to get them involved with counterparts on the campus. A data base of 135
groups was set up for receipt of a newsletter.
By mid August a flyer was being circulated --- a circle with a variety of kids
inside it, and many gaps in the circle itself. Outside were a few
individuals, with the legend reading: "If you aren't included now, its not our
fault." On the other side was a series of listings of the initiatives being
undertaken and the opportunities that were available.
"Our goal as a student body this year is not just to have a good time with
sports and socials," Maria wrote in the first issue of the student paper her
Senior year ."Those we will have. But it is also to be a part of the larger
community and to include as much of the student body community in our
endeavors as possible. To this end we are activating links which have either
been sorely neglected in the past or which have simply never existed. The
degree to which they continue to function after we are done will depend on how
valuable the students today, this year, prove them to be."
As the Maria Sanchez "organization" moved forward, students of size and other
minority groups were used wherever possible. Because with participation in
the groups also went the opportunity for part time jobs in the community
interest was kept up. And because the newly reenergized PTA was working with
students, faculty and parents grades kept up as well. By the end of the first
semester the overall student GPA was up a full half point; by the end of the
school year it was a point.
As for Maria, her weight stabilized somewhere near 240, the exact figure
neither she or anyone else particularly cared about noting it at the time.
Except, possible, Marcus Amoreaux --- another student of Hispanic heritage who
had moved to the school as a Sophomore and begun dating Maria in the middle of
her Junior year. Active in her campaign and throughout the summer, he won her
trust and heart. He was himself a good student. They both received
scholarships and became increasingly close in college. They have been married
for several years now and have two ninos (children).
(An Observer Tale)